Monday, March 9, 2009

Why I Don't Do Drugs

No, this is not a parole requirement, this is just me being real with an essay on why I don't do drugs (or smoke cigarettes!!). Well, the cigarette part is very straightforward and if I had enough courage, I could probably make sure my kids didn't smoke them either. My parents were both smokers (at one time or another). When I smell the familiar cigars of my dad, I think back to the years of my childhood when we would be sailing and he would be smoking cigars. I never knew my mom to smoke but apparently she did and she knew enough (even in 1979) to know that she didn't want her kids to smoke. So when I was five years old, she gave me one. Yep. I was standing in the breezeway which also happens to be the living quarters for our pets. At least one of my brothers was there as I carefully held that cigarette between my fingers just as I'd seen them do on TV. Of course, I'd "smoked" CANDY cigarettes many times. Remember those? That awful plastic-y candy stick that, if they were the really cool kind, had a reddish-brown tip to look like it was burning and would expel "smoke" (powdered sugar) if you exhaled through the candy. Ahhhhh, good times! Anyway, there I stood on the steps, probably with braids or ponytails, with a cigarette dangling in my hand. I slowly pulled the it up to my mouth, took a deep drag and.....coughed up a lung. Actually almost threw up right there on the steps. And I NEVER had even the slightest desire to try one again. Now that's good parenting folks!

As for the drugs, there are lots of stories like the one I've experienced today but this one will suffice. Last night, oh some NINETEEN hours ago, I took two Tylenol Cold & Cough Nighttime pills. I took two because that is what they recommended but I should have known better. Nineteen hours later I a still dragging. To be fair, I slept quite well and all my drainage was cleared up enough to crash for the night. But when I shut off my alarm this morning, I knew it would take something like THIS to get me out of bed. I kept trying to devise ways to get out of taking my daughter and my niece and nephew to school, but no realistic solutions surfaced and even though I fell back to sleep, I did get up and (uh-oh) drive them to school. After which I went to the post office and grocery store and the library and still I was dragging. I came home, visited with my mom, took Doodle to school and came back home and was still dragging. So after putting Mator down for her nap, I took one too. And here's where the drug effect really takes over-I have some crazy weird dreams. Suffice to say that all I remember from this one was that I was having a candid discussion with a German cleaning man about whether or not "Handy Manny" was actually a German cartoon. In my dream, Manny actually had a sign posted on his wall that said, "Escuchen Deutsch" which would loosely translate into, "LISTEN GERMAN!". So anyhoo, that, in a nutshell, is why I don't do drugs or smoke cigarettes!

***********This is not something I'm used to writing about but a little request, would you keep my family (especially my mom) in your prayers? My great-great aunt Elsie passed away yesterday. I'm going to try an write some about this neat lady but I wasn't quite ready yet. Thanks! *************************

3 comments:

Stace said...

Praying....

BoufMom9 said...

Love your mom's unconventional way to get you not to smoke. LOL If it works...
Will certainly keep your family in my prayers.

ps Yes, i heard the story on Glenn Beck, but also heard it on O'Reilly and have seen it online as well. Very sad.

Melissa said...

Wow, that nightime cold stuff has just the opposite effect on me. I don't get sleepy, I get wired. It does the same thing to my kids. Weird.
I remember the first time I took a drag. Same thing. It was a Marlboro Red. Those things are lethal. Benson & Hedges Deluxe Ultra Lights were my cigarette of choice. I was stupid and didn't learn my lesson from the first go round. Fortunately, I got my head on straight.

The lesson is unconventional, but may be one worth trying if you have a child that things smoking is cool.